The Monday Thru Friday Show was the 12th episode of Season 1 of Roseanne, also the 12th overall series episode. Directed by Ellen Falcon and written by Danny Jacobson, it first aired on ABC-TV on January 24, 1989.
Dan and Roseanne are at odds about where to spend a romantic 15th anniversary. Becky refuses to dissect a frog in biology class. Darlene finds her paper route more than she can handle.
- Jackie (to Roseanne): You know what'd be my idea of a perfect honeymoon?
- Roseanne: Uh, Mel Gibson and a stick of butter.
- Roseanne (to Becky): Go wash up for dinner now.
- Becky: What are we having?
- Roseanne: Frog legs.
- Becky: You're demented.
- [About Becky refusing to do a frog dissection]
- Roseanne: Those frogs are already dead when you cut them up.
- Becky: But if I didn't have to cut it up, mine wouldn't have to die.
- Jackie: Sounds like you got it figured out.
- Becky: Yeah, but if I don't do it, it'll bring my A average down to a C.
- Roseanne: Well, if you feel that strongly about something, don't do it.
- Becky: Won't you be mad at me?
- Roseanne: The only way I'd be mad at you would be if you did something that you absolutely knew was wrong.
- Roseanne (to Darlene): Two customers have already started calling for their papers.
- Darlene: Damn!
- Roseanne: Well, there's no need to cuss for hell's sake.
- Becky: I still can't believe I got a C.
- Roseanne: Well Becky, if all you cared about was getting an A, you would've gone in there and chopped up that frog, but instead you did the right thing.
- Becky: If I did the right thing, how come I feel so lousy?
- Roseanne: Well, maybe it's your body rejecting the C.
- Mr. Attleroy (to Darlene): Maybe you can tell me why Mr. Palmer only gets his paper every other day.
- Darlene: Well, his house is kind of hard to see from the road. Sometimes I forget.
- Mr. Attleroy: Did you forget about Mr. Johnson's altogether? Because he's never gotten a paper.
- Darlene: Mr. who?
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