The Monday Thru Friday Show was the 12th episode of Season 1 of Roseanne, also the 12th overall series episode. Directed by Ellen Falcon and written by Danny Jacobson, it first aired on ABC-TV on January 24, 1989.


Dan and Roseanne are at odds about where to spend a romantic 15th anniversary. Becky refuses to dissect a frog in biology class. Darlene finds her paper route more than she can handle.


Jackie (to Roseanne): You know what'd be my idea of a perfect honeymoon?
Roseanne: Uh, Mel Gibson and a stick of butter.

Roseanne (to Becky): Go wash up for dinner now.
Becky: What are we having?
Roseanne: Frog legs.
Becky: You're demented.

[About Becky refusing to do a frog dissection]
Roseanne: Those frogs are already dead when you cut them up.
Becky: But if I didn't have to cut it up, mine wouldn't have to die.
Jackie: Sounds like you got it figured out.
Becky: Yeah, but if I don't do it, it'll bring my A average down to a C.
Roseanne: Well, if you feel that strongly about something, don't do it.
Becky: Won't you be mad at me?
Roseanne: The only way I'd be mad at you would be if you did something that you absolutely knew was wrong.

Roseanne (to Darlene): Two customers have already started calling for their papers.
Darlene: Damn!
Roseanne: Well, there's no need to cuss for hell's sake.

Becky: I still can't believe I got a C.
Roseanne: Well Becky, if all you cared about was getting an A, you would've gone in there and chopped up that frog, but instead you did the right thing.
Becky: If I did the right thing, how come I feel so lousy?
Roseanne: Well, maybe it's your body rejecting the C.

Mr. Attleroy (to Darlene): Maybe you can tell me why Mr. Palmer only gets his paper every other day.
Darlene: Well, his house is kind of hard to see from the road. Sometimes I forget.
Mr. Attleroy: Did you forget about Mr. Johnson's altogether? Because he's never gotten a paper.
Darlene: Mr. who?

Roseanne: Season One (Season 1)

Life and Stuff|We're in the Money|D-I-V-O-R-C-E|Language Lessons|Radio Days|Lovers' Lane|The Memory Game|Here's to Good Friends|Dan's Birthday Bash|Saturday|Canoga Time|The Monday Thru Friday Show|Bridge Over Troubled Sonny|Father's Day|Nightmare on Oak Street|Mall Story|Becky's Choice|Slice of Life|Workin' Overtime|Toto, We're Not in Kansas Anymore|Death and Stuff|Dear Mom and Dad|Let's Call It Quits

Season Episode Guides

Season 1|Season 2|Season 3|Season 4|Season 5|Season 6|Season 7|Season 8|Season 9|Season 10